Pinocchio: Unstrung
Right, so you've seen the headlines, haven't you? Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey, Mickey's Muscle, that Popeye slasher flick that no one actually watched. The whole 'public domain character gets a horror makeover' thing has become less a fresh idea and more a tired gag, usually resulting in straight-to-streaming duds that barely register. Which is why Pinocchio: Unstrung arriving on the scene with anything resembling actual competence feels like a minor miracle, honestly. It's not reinventing the gore-soaked wheel, mind, but it absolutely rises above the absolute muck of its brethren.
See, where most of these cash-grab horrors fail is giving you anyone to care about, or a villain whose motivations aren't just 'because it's public domain now!' But Unstrung, credit where it's due, actually makes Pinocchioβs warped crusade to eliminate 'bad' from the world feel almostβ¦ logical, in a terrifying, childlike way. You've got James, the lad who introduces him to the world, and Pinocchio himself, whose naive brand of murderous purity genuinely builds some palpable tension. When a twist lands, it doesn't feel like a cheap jump-scare but rather a moment thatβs been earned, tying the whole twisted narrative together rather neatly.
So, is it a masterpiece? Nah, probably not. You won't be putting it on your 'Best Horror of the Decade' list. But if you're after a decent scare and fancy seeing a familiar puppet-boy go full-on serial killer without feeling completely ripped off by the effort, then Pinocchio: Unstrung is surprisingly a good shout. Skip it if you're looking for elevated horror or something genuinely profound, but if you're up for a Friday night horror where the antagonist actually makes sense for a change, give it a go. It might just surprise you by pulling its own strings rather effectively.
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